By Sue Ndungu
A lot of women have immature men to thank for toxic relationships and unhealthy dating patterns. Simply because a guy hit puberty and is above the legal age does not mean they have what it takes to offer you’re a substantial commitment.
Since women mature faster than men, they have to be extra careful when looking for a forever partner. But most ladies do not have the first clue about how a mature man should act. So, they end up falling for playboys that waste the best years of their lives.
Lucky for you, it is time to break this relationship ignominy of emotionally unstable boys in men’s bodies. This post will be your step-by-step guideline on identifying a mature man and hopefully having a lifetime partnership with him.
How Do You Recognize a Mature Man?
It is unfortunate that in the 21st Century, people have forgotten what it takes to have a successful relationship. As a result, the distinction between machismo and egoistical sexism is often overlooked.
Sadly, a few guys in their mid-20s and older ones do not know what it means to be mature in a relationship. Mature men are mentally and emotionally strong, hardworking providers, great listeners, protectors, and critical thinkers.
A mature man understands that there are people who look up to him and sets his primacies straight. Whenever he exhibits weakness, he owns up and makes things right.
What Are the Signs of Maturity in a Man?
Are you tired of being the grown-up in your relationship? Raising a man and letting him get away with childish behaviors? You might be surprised how many women are! To find an emotionally mature man, you must know what signs to look for in the early dating stages.
- He Does Not Play Games
When you are in a relationship with a grown-up, he will never play mind games. Neither will he send you mixed signals over and over. You won’t get messages like, “sorry I forgot about our date, can’t make it” or “you didn’t call me first.”
His communication and intentions should be straightforward, that you should never think deep into his words. Mature men say what they mean and mean what they say.
- He Treats You as His Equal
Have you ever had a guy get intimidated by your achievements, personality, and intelligence? Grown men are not frightened by empowered women. Instead, they support and take pride in them.
A mature man will not dismiss your thought and opinions even if they differ from his. He should regard you as a partner, respecting and valuing you as you do him.
- He is Decisive and Accountable
You will not have to worry about confusion when dating a mature man. He is decisive in every aspect of his life and knows that his actions have consequences. A grown-up is not scared to make hard decisions because he knows his decidedness affects your future with him.
If he makes the wrong decision and things in his life start going sideways, he will not blame others or throw a pity party. He acknowledges his faults, learns from them and works on being a better companion.
- He Can Commit Long-Term
Another mark of maturity in a man is the ability to keep long-term commitments. Be it in his career, studies, family, or relationship. He is not emotionally mature to date you if he constantly self-sabotages or looks for an easier way out.
- He is There During the Downs
Grown-up men understand that life and love have ups and downs and do not bail when things get tough. You can have complicated and awkward conversations, and he will be honest throughout even if you don’t like the responses. Maturity means a man can resolve arguments without getting violent or abusive.
How Does a Mature Man Behave?
Emotionally mature guys are not afraid of their feelings. They do not hide what they feel, no matter how overwhelming it is. Rather, they welcome whatever emotions they are experiencing and handle them with wisdom.
Next, a mature man is aware of toxic patterns that may affect the people around him. A man will display his maturity – or immaturity – when he is at his worst. Accepting that he has terrible traits and working on changing them is a green flag.
Grown-up men are also aware of the importance of loyalty, honesty, and trust. These are the main ingredients to a healthy relationship. And if a man lacks them, he is not emotionally mature.
It is crucial to analyze a guy’s behavior in the early dating stages to avoid short-term relationships. If he does not act accordingly, you can always step in and help them grow for the better. But don’t stick around too much for him to get away with being immature.
What a Mature Man Wants in a Relationship
Now that you already know how to tell if a man is mature enough to date, it is about time you understood what he desires in a relationship. Identifying a grown-up guy is the first step. Finding out what he is looking for in a woman is the next.
Just because a man is mature, it does not mean that he will tell you everything he wants in a relationship. So, it is up to you to know these wants and act on them. Once you do, you will have learned the secret to finding and keeping a good man.
- Your Happiness
A mature man wants you to be happy. If you cannot find self-love and happiness is within you, how can you love somebody else? Your happiness is a reflection of the effort you man puts into the relationship.
- A Supportive Partner
Subsequently, grown-up men love a woman that takes an interest in their hobbies. Men think of relationships as the only safe space for emotional openness, opinionated conversations, and goofy behavior. If you show him you do not care about his interests – no matter how trivial – he will have fewer hopes for a future with you.
- Respect, Admiration, Acceptance
Mature men also want acceptance, respect, and praise in a relationship. No man will stay in a partnership where their ego is always questioned. Men need (not want) respect as for them; it goes hand in hand with love.
Praise from a lover means everything to a man. A little admiration goes a long way in boosting a mature man’s self-esteem and worth. Hence, he will be a confident protector and provider, knowing that you believe in him.
- Emotional Intimacy and Maturity
Men are not the best when opening up and breaking down. Therefore, a grown-up man will look for a woman who makes him comfortable expressing his feelings, has good communication and acts tough when times are hard.
Furthermore, no man would like to be with a woman who plays mind games and has poor communication. If you are emotionally immature, take a step back and work on yourself before jumping to the dating game.
- Romance and a Physical Connection
Grown-up men find a woman that can initiate sex attractive and empowered. Being physically intimate is a big part of all substantial relationships. A woman that makes spontaneous romantic gestures is a massive turn-on for a man.
You can try sexy lingerie once in a while, holding hands, impromptu kisses – you name it! The little things you think make no difference dramatically impact how a mature man feels about you.
Things Mature Men Don’t Do
You already know all the signs of green light in a relationship, but do you know the type of men you should avoid? Do you know what warning signs to check out for?
Mature men will never:
· Be afraid of asking for help in fear of looking weak
· Hold grudges from past arguments
· Fail to keep their word, and if they do, they own up
· Feel insecure about their physical appearance or mental capability
· Be bullies or get bullied
· Be scared to make difficult decisions
· Play mind games and make up excuses
· Let their ego affect their humility
· Be abusive or offensive to other men and women, especially
· Disregard your feeling and thoughts
If you keep entertaining an immature guy, he will get used to it and finally lose respect for you and your relationship. You can give him room to change but don’t show naivety by entertaining an emotionally childish man.
Women mature fast, and, in most relationships, they are the grown-ups. Nevertheless, men should strive to contribute to the stability of their relationships too.
As a woman looking for a lifelong partner, you should never settle for an emotionally immature or unstable man. Even if you believe that he will change one day and you will get your happily ever after, be careful not to fall victim to an unhealthy commitment.
Women always have strong instincts when it comes to immature men; they just choose to ignore them. Lucky for you, you can always refer to this post whenever you start dating someone new. If he does not meet the maturity mark, then he is not worthy of your time.